source (thanks @lauratiz)
My mom: “Hurry up, we have to go now!”
Me: “I’m coming…”
Checking your phone in the middle of the night
Me right now. Why am
I awake?! 😫
mermaids don’t have thigh gaps but they can still lure men to their deaths
Strength is being able to crush a tomato.
Dexterity is being able to dodge a tomato.
Constitution is being able to eat a bad tomato.
Intelligence is knowing a tomato is a fruit.
Wisdom is knowing not to put a tomato in a fruit salad.
Charisma is being able to sell a tomato based fruit salad.
If I stop reblogging this assume I’m dead